Online dating continues to grow rapidly and getting the first date can make or break what happens next. Making a good first impression is important but not rocket science either.
Below are some first tips to setting up the first date and what to do on the day of:
1) Try Having a Phone Conversation With The Person First Before Setting Up a Time and Place to Meet - Arranging a meeting via e-mail is easy to do but you will want to make sure you can have a conversation with the person first. Someone may be comfortable e-mailing you back and forth but the two of you may not be able to have much of a conversation in person. Try setting up a phone conversation beforehand to see if the other person is someone you can talk to easily.
2) Pick a Place That Is Comfortable For Both of You - Picking a place that is familiar and comfortable for both of you will help make the first date more relaxing. This will help both of you settle in and begin a conversation.
3) Relax, Relax, Relax - It's okay to be a little nervous on a first date but remember to just relax and let the conversation flow. Building a good conversation can take a little skill at time but isn't as overbearing as it seems. Sit back, relax and enjoy your date for the evening.
4) Take Time to Get to Know the Other Person - Avoid babbling about yourself or random topics and focus your time on getting to know the other person. Find out what his or her interests are, what he or she likes to do and learn about that person. Take the time to listen and respond and you will develop a conversation.
Showing posts with label dating tips. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dating tips. Show all posts
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Two Important Dating Tips: Listening and Showing Interest
Meeting someone for the first time on a date can be exciting and nerve racking. Making a good first impression is important so it is natural to feel a little nervous before the first date. If you do like the person, you will want to make a good first impression.
While making a first good impression is important, it is not as difficult as it seems. You don't have to resort to cute charms, over the top ideas or outrageous stunts to win someone over. One of the best ways to make a good first impression is to listen to the other person and show interest.
During the first date, it is easy to provide your own verbal autobiography but it won't win you many favors. Spending too much on yourself could be a turn off and you will want to listen to the other person's responses. Take the time to listen to what the other person is saying instead of providing him/her with your life story.
By listening to your date, you will be able to have a better conversation because it will provide points for the two of you to talk about. Taking the time to listen provides opportunity to learn more about the other person and keeps the conversation moving forward. It will provide you with a better understanding of what the other person is passionate about in life.
In addition to listening, show an interest in what the other person is talking about and it will help the conversation and date tremendously. Taking time to show an interest in the topic at hand will prove to the other person you have an interest in getting to know him/her. That will make the conversation flow better and increase the chances you will get another date.
By not showing an interest, you run the risk of coming across that you don't like the other person or don't care. How many times have you been on other dates where the other person didn't care much as to what you were talking about? How many times have you had normal conversations where the other person didn't show much interest in you? Chances are, you probably walked away feeling like the other person didn't care. It's unfortunate it happens but keep in mind how the other person may feel if you ignore or don't show an interest.
While having a first date can be exciting and nerve racking, taking the time to listen and show an interest are two steps to making it a good one.
While making a first good impression is important, it is not as difficult as it seems. You don't have to resort to cute charms, over the top ideas or outrageous stunts to win someone over. One of the best ways to make a good first impression is to listen to the other person and show interest.
During the first date, it is easy to provide your own verbal autobiography but it won't win you many favors. Spending too much on yourself could be a turn off and you will want to listen to the other person's responses. Take the time to listen to what the other person is saying instead of providing him/her with your life story.
By listening to your date, you will be able to have a better conversation because it will provide points for the two of you to talk about. Taking the time to listen provides opportunity to learn more about the other person and keeps the conversation moving forward. It will provide you with a better understanding of what the other person is passionate about in life.
In addition to listening, show an interest in what the other person is talking about and it will help the conversation and date tremendously. Taking time to show an interest in the topic at hand will prove to the other person you have an interest in getting to know him/her. That will make the conversation flow better and increase the chances you will get another date.
By not showing an interest, you run the risk of coming across that you don't like the other person or don't care. How many times have you been on other dates where the other person didn't care much as to what you were talking about? How many times have you had normal conversations where the other person didn't show much interest in you? Chances are, you probably walked away feeling like the other person didn't care. It's unfortunate it happens but keep in mind how the other person may feel if you ignore or don't show an interest.
While having a first date can be exciting and nerve racking, taking the time to listen and show an interest are two steps to making it a good one.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
More Online Dating Tips......
Online Dating continues to be a growing trend for many people. It's not an exact science but has helped many people get dates and find someone to spend time with.
Below are some tips for venturing into the Online Dating world:
1) Talk With Others Who Have Used Different Dating Sites - This will give you an idea what to expect before joining a site. Take the time to talk with people who have used the different sites to understand what to expect and how the process works.
2) Take the Time to Manage Your Personal Appearance Before the First Date - This might sound obvious but you may turn off someone by looking sloppy or like you just rolled out of bed. Take a few minutes to dress appropriately, look nice and presentable to the other person.
3) If You Haven't Dated in a While, See If You Can Go on a "Mock Date"With a Friend - This idea might sound corny but if you haven't dated in a while, it can be really helpful. If you haven't dated for a while, this is a way to get a little practice before going on a real date. It also helps relieve the jitters a bit too.
4) Know Who is In Your Corner - It always helps to have some support so find people who can maybe lend some advice and support your efforts.
Below are some tips for venturing into the Online Dating world:
1) Talk With Others Who Have Used Different Dating Sites - This will give you an idea what to expect before joining a site. Take the time to talk with people who have used the different sites to understand what to expect and how the process works.
2) Take the Time to Manage Your Personal Appearance Before the First Date - This might sound obvious but you may turn off someone by looking sloppy or like you just rolled out of bed. Take a few minutes to dress appropriately, look nice and presentable to the other person.
3) If You Haven't Dated in a While, See If You Can Go on a "Mock Date"With a Friend - This idea might sound corny but if you haven't dated in a while, it can be really helpful. If you haven't dated for a while, this is a way to get a little practice before going on a real date. It also helps relieve the jitters a bit too.
4) Know Who is In Your Corner - It always helps to have some support so find people who can maybe lend some advice and support your efforts.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Tips Learned Along The Way With The Dating Scene
In 2011, I took the time to join Match.com and entered the so called "dating scene." I did take myself a little bit out of my comfort zone by doing so but have learned a lot along the way.
Below are some dating tips I have learned along the way while participating in the "dating scene:"
1) Listen to Your Date - I know this might sound obvious but not listening to your date can be a real turnoff! A good friend of mine mentioned to me once we are given two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we talk. Take the time to listen to your date and listen to the responses.
2) Look Presentable to Your Date - I understand that might sound obvious as well but try to have a neat appearance when meeting for the first time. On a personal note, I usually leave out my earring, wear a nice pair of shoes and shirt on the first date. You will want to make a good first impression and looking sloppy could leave the wrong impression or make it look like you are not taking the date seriously.
3) Be Polite to the Server - This one mainly applies to restaurants but also can apply to coffee shops and bars. Make sure you are polite to the person who is serving as your waiter, waitress, barista, etc. Being impolite or making rude comments to the server can be a turn off and your date may not want to go out with you again as a result of it.
4) Be Patient After the First Date - If you end up going out with someone you like, you don't have to send multiple texts or put in multiple phone calls the next day. It may be easy to be "Captain Text Message" or "Captain Phone Call" to get your date's attention but keep in mind that it's not the end of the world if you don't get a response right away. Keep in mind that the other person may be tied up with something else and may be waiting for a better time to return your text or call.
5) If Possible, Try and Meet Somewhere That Will Work for the Both of You - When setting up the date, try and find a location that will work out best for the two of you. Meeting at a place that is familiar to both of you and equal distance will make it easier to meet up.
6) If Utilizing Match.com or other Online Dating, Try and Have a Phone Conversation with the Other Person First Before Setting Up a First Date - It is easy to e-mail someone back and forth and set up a date that way, however, speaking to them can be very different. While you may be able to e-mail someone back and forth and keep a conversation going, talking to them may be a different story. You will want to find out if you are able to have a conversation with the person before deciding whether or not to meet up for a first date. You may find you can e-mail the person back and forth but can't hold a conversation.
7) Focus On the Person You Are on a Date With, Not Someone From the Past - Take the time to get to know the date sitting in front of you and try not to focus or spend a lot of time discussing an ex from the past. It may be easy to bring up a bad relationship but it may come across as whining to your date. Building a relationship starts with taking the time to know the person in front of you.
Below are some dating tips I have learned along the way while participating in the "dating scene:"
1) Listen to Your Date - I know this might sound obvious but not listening to your date can be a real turnoff! A good friend of mine mentioned to me once we are given two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we talk. Take the time to listen to your date and listen to the responses.
2) Look Presentable to Your Date - I understand that might sound obvious as well but try to have a neat appearance when meeting for the first time. On a personal note, I usually leave out my earring, wear a nice pair of shoes and shirt on the first date. You will want to make a good first impression and looking sloppy could leave the wrong impression or make it look like you are not taking the date seriously.
3) Be Polite to the Server - This one mainly applies to restaurants but also can apply to coffee shops and bars. Make sure you are polite to the person who is serving as your waiter, waitress, barista, etc. Being impolite or making rude comments to the server can be a turn off and your date may not want to go out with you again as a result of it.
4) Be Patient After the First Date - If you end up going out with someone you like, you don't have to send multiple texts or put in multiple phone calls the next day. It may be easy to be "Captain Text Message" or "Captain Phone Call" to get your date's attention but keep in mind that it's not the end of the world if you don't get a response right away. Keep in mind that the other person may be tied up with something else and may be waiting for a better time to return your text or call.
5) If Possible, Try and Meet Somewhere That Will Work for the Both of You - When setting up the date, try and find a location that will work out best for the two of you. Meeting at a place that is familiar to both of you and equal distance will make it easier to meet up.
6) If Utilizing Match.com or other Online Dating, Try and Have a Phone Conversation with the Other Person First Before Setting Up a First Date - It is easy to e-mail someone back and forth and set up a date that way, however, speaking to them can be very different. While you may be able to e-mail someone back and forth and keep a conversation going, talking to them may be a different story. You will want to find out if you are able to have a conversation with the person before deciding whether or not to meet up for a first date. You may find you can e-mail the person back and forth but can't hold a conversation.
7) Focus On the Person You Are on a Date With, Not Someone From the Past - Take the time to get to know the date sitting in front of you and try not to focus or spend a lot of time discussing an ex from the past. It may be easy to bring up a bad relationship but it may come across as whining to your date. Building a relationship starts with taking the time to know the person in front of you.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Rules for Meeting a New Person (Can Also Be Used for Dating)
Whether it is for business or for personal reasons, meeting new people is essential in life. Taking the time to develop relationships with others can be beneficial for business and in your personal life.
Below are some tips to use when meeting someone for the first time (for those of you interest in dating, these rules can apply as well):
1) Take the Time to Listen to the Other Person - It's easy to provide someone with your own personal verbal autobiography, however, that doesn't show an interest in the person you are trying to build a relationship with. The other person will probably become bored easily and will not want to further the relationship. Instead of talking about yourself, take the time to listen to what the other person has to say.
2) Show an Interest in the Other Person - Take the time to learn about the other person's interests, passions in life, goals, hobbies, etc. This will make the other person feel more comfortable with you and will make for a better conversation.
3) Eye Contact - When you don't look at the other person in the eye, he or she will notice. You may not think so but eye contact can be very important.
4) Be Respectful to the Other Person and Those Around You At the Time of the Meeting - This may sound obvious but being disrespectful to the other person or those around you at the time of the meeting can be a huge turn off. Small things such as a cell phone or pager going off, constantly texting during the meeting, or answering a call during the meeting can be a turn off to someone. If the person is taking time out of his or her day to meet you, be respectful and do not make the person feel like you aren't willing to pay attention to the conversation.
Below are some tips to use when meeting someone for the first time (for those of you interest in dating, these rules can apply as well):
1) Take the Time to Listen to the Other Person - It's easy to provide someone with your own personal verbal autobiography, however, that doesn't show an interest in the person you are trying to build a relationship with. The other person will probably become bored easily and will not want to further the relationship. Instead of talking about yourself, take the time to listen to what the other person has to say.
2) Show an Interest in the Other Person - Take the time to learn about the other person's interests, passions in life, goals, hobbies, etc. This will make the other person feel more comfortable with you and will make for a better conversation.
3) Eye Contact - When you don't look at the other person in the eye, he or she will notice. You may not think so but eye contact can be very important.
4) Be Respectful to the Other Person and Those Around You At the Time of the Meeting - This may sound obvious but being disrespectful to the other person or those around you at the time of the meeting can be a huge turn off. Small things such as a cell phone or pager going off, constantly texting during the meeting, or answering a call during the meeting can be a turn off to someone. If the person is taking time out of his or her day to meet you, be respectful and do not make the person feel like you aren't willing to pay attention to the conversation.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Small Manners Can Go A Long Way
As we were growing up, we were probably taught the importance of saying "please," "thank you," and "your welcome" when someone went out of his or her way to do something polite for you. As we got older, we also learned the importance of taking the time to say "thank you" via a card or e-mail to someone who may have helped us along the way. These manners are simple but minding them in key situations can go a long way.
When you have done a favor for someone, have you ever noticed what it feels like when the person you helped does not say "thank you?" Have you gone out of your way to assist someone with an event and not receive any gratitude at all? If this has happened to you, you probably would not be as inclined to help this person again because of the lack of effort shown to express gratitude for your help and assistance. All it could have taken this person was a small thank you note to show gratitude and you would feel different about the situation at that time.
Even when you don't think manners are important, put yourself in the other person's shoes. For example, if a guy was on a date with a girl, how do you think the girl would feel if the guy didn't open the door for her? On the flip side, how do you think the guy would feel if his date didn't say thank you for opening the door or gave him dirty looks for doing so? How do you think one would feel if the date completely ignored the other person and didn't show any appreciation towards the effort being given by the other person to be polite? In cases like this, the smallest of manners can mean a lot and can make a difference.
Below are some tips that can be used in multiple situations whether it is networking, business or even dating:
1) Be Polite To Those Around You - For example, when you are at a restaurant, there is a difference between asking your server for a glass of water and demanding it. You will catch more flies with honey if you politely ask, "Excuse, when you have a moment, could you please get me a glass of water?" then you will with "Go get me a glass of water!" This plus taking a couple of minutes to ask how someone's day is going can help a lot.
2) Opening Doors Can Go A Long Way - It sounds simple but I'll admit I don't feel right if I don't open the door for someone or at least look back to see if someone is behind me when I am about to go into someplace. Taking a few moments to open the door for someone (gentleman, pay attention) can really mean a lot to someone.
3) If You Choose To Spend Time With Someone, Do Not Ignore That Other Person- I know this one sounds bizarre and obvious but you would be surprised how hurtful it can be when someone you want to spend time with just blows you off or doesn't pay attention to you. For example, if you are a high school or college student and if you decide to take a date to a dance or formal, take the time to talk with that person throughout the night, spend time with that person and ask him or her to dance (this last one is key). Imagine how that person will feel if you don't take the time to talk to him or her or offer to take them on the dance floor during that night. Chances are, that person will feel hurt that you didn't spend time with him or her (trust me on this one) and will have the night ruined because of it.
4) The Importance Of "Thank You" - They are only two words and they are simple to say. Make sure to say thank you in situations where it is necessary and don't forget to show your gratitude.
When you have done a favor for someone, have you ever noticed what it feels like when the person you helped does not say "thank you?" Have you gone out of your way to assist someone with an event and not receive any gratitude at all? If this has happened to you, you probably would not be as inclined to help this person again because of the lack of effort shown to express gratitude for your help and assistance. All it could have taken this person was a small thank you note to show gratitude and you would feel different about the situation at that time.
Even when you don't think manners are important, put yourself in the other person's shoes. For example, if a guy was on a date with a girl, how do you think the girl would feel if the guy didn't open the door for her? On the flip side, how do you think the guy would feel if his date didn't say thank you for opening the door or gave him dirty looks for doing so? How do you think one would feel if the date completely ignored the other person and didn't show any appreciation towards the effort being given by the other person to be polite? In cases like this, the smallest of manners can mean a lot and can make a difference.
Below are some tips that can be used in multiple situations whether it is networking, business or even dating:
1) Be Polite To Those Around You - For example, when you are at a restaurant, there is a difference between asking your server for a glass of water and demanding it. You will catch more flies with honey if you politely ask, "Excuse, when you have a moment, could you please get me a glass of water?" then you will with "Go get me a glass of water!" This plus taking a couple of minutes to ask how someone's day is going can help a lot.
2) Opening Doors Can Go A Long Way - It sounds simple but I'll admit I don't feel right if I don't open the door for someone or at least look back to see if someone is behind me when I am about to go into someplace. Taking a few moments to open the door for someone (gentleman, pay attention) can really mean a lot to someone.
3) If You Choose To Spend Time With Someone, Do Not Ignore That Other Person- I know this one sounds bizarre and obvious but you would be surprised how hurtful it can be when someone you want to spend time with just blows you off or doesn't pay attention to you. For example, if you are a high school or college student and if you decide to take a date to a dance or formal, take the time to talk with that person throughout the night, spend time with that person and ask him or her to dance (this last one is key). Imagine how that person will feel if you don't take the time to talk to him or her or offer to take them on the dance floor during that night. Chances are, that person will feel hurt that you didn't spend time with him or her (trust me on this one) and will have the night ruined because of it.
4) The Importance Of "Thank You" - They are only two words and they are simple to say. Make sure to say thank you in situations where it is necessary and don't forget to show your gratitude.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Meeting People On A Date- Some Helpful Tips
While writing my last post, I couldn't help but think how some of the tips I had to building friendships and relationships can apply to dating as well. The situations are a little bit different but some of the same concepts can apply.
When on a date, it's important to take time to get to know the other person, be polite and be relaxed. Below are some of the same tips I had in my last post but how they can apply to dating:
1) Take Time To Get to Know the Other Person and Avoid Giving Your Own Verbal Autobiography - When dating someone, take the time to get to know the other person rather then provide your whole life story on the first date. Take time to get to know what the other person enjoys doing, his or her passions and interests. The key is to learn more about the other person and learn more about him or her to develop the relationship.
2) We Were Given Two Ears and One Mouth so We Can Listen Twice as Much as We Talk - I know I mentioned this in my last post but it does apply here as well. Listen to the other person when on your date and learn more about him or her. Talking too much could end up in monopolizing the conversation and may bore your date. Take the time to listen, learn more about the other person and you will be able to hold a conversation more easily then if you don't listen.
3) Make Eye Contact - If you don't make eye contact, people will notice. Eye contact is something that I have struggled with at times and people have noticed it when I didn't! Make sure to make eye contact with your date.
4) Relax- Going on a date for the first time can be a little nerve racking, however, being more relaxed will help you listen better, learn more about the other person and hold a conversation more easily.
5) Be Polite to the Person Serving You - No matter where you are at with your date, be polite to the people around you and serving you as well. For example, if you are at a restaurant, be polite to your server. Being impolite, impatient, or disrespectful could be a huge turnoff and may eliminate any chances of getting a future date with the person you are with. Treat the person who is your server as a friend and with respect. There is a big difference between saying "Hey server, get me a glass of water!" and "Excuse, when you have a moment, could I have another glass of water please?" and your date will know that as well.
6) If Possible, Turn Off Your Cell Phone and Avoid Looking at Messages or Calls When Sitting With the Person - Personally, I hate talking on my cell phone when I am with someone else and prefer to have it completely turned off so that any call will go straight to my voicemail and not be a distraction during the date. You can always respond to the message later but you can't always get a second chance with a person you ignored because you took a phone call or text message during the date.
7) Don't Be Down On Yourself If A Date Doesn't Work Out- We all have had dates that didn't quite work out or have gone out on dates with people we didn't feel a connection with during the interaction. It can be hard to take sometimes but don't take it personally and realize there are other people out there. If a date doesn't work out, be respectful to that person, don't blast him or her on Twitter, Facebook or in other forms of media and remember to respect his or her feelings. It's better to move on then to go out of your way to hurt someone else's feelings over a date that didn't work out. Even if you don't go out with this person again or become friends, the person will remember if you were polite and respectful.
When on a date, it's important to take time to get to know the other person, be polite and be relaxed. Below are some of the same tips I had in my last post but how they can apply to dating:
1) Take Time To Get to Know the Other Person and Avoid Giving Your Own Verbal Autobiography - When dating someone, take the time to get to know the other person rather then provide your whole life story on the first date. Take time to get to know what the other person enjoys doing, his or her passions and interests. The key is to learn more about the other person and learn more about him or her to develop the relationship.
2) We Were Given Two Ears and One Mouth so We Can Listen Twice as Much as We Talk - I know I mentioned this in my last post but it does apply here as well. Listen to the other person when on your date and learn more about him or her. Talking too much could end up in monopolizing the conversation and may bore your date. Take the time to listen, learn more about the other person and you will be able to hold a conversation more easily then if you don't listen.
3) Make Eye Contact - If you don't make eye contact, people will notice. Eye contact is something that I have struggled with at times and people have noticed it when I didn't! Make sure to make eye contact with your date.
4) Relax- Going on a date for the first time can be a little nerve racking, however, being more relaxed will help you listen better, learn more about the other person and hold a conversation more easily.
5) Be Polite to the Person Serving You - No matter where you are at with your date, be polite to the people around you and serving you as well. For example, if you are at a restaurant, be polite to your server. Being impolite, impatient, or disrespectful could be a huge turnoff and may eliminate any chances of getting a future date with the person you are with. Treat the person who is your server as a friend and with respect. There is a big difference between saying "Hey server, get me a glass of water!" and "Excuse, when you have a moment, could I have another glass of water please?" and your date will know that as well.
6) If Possible, Turn Off Your Cell Phone and Avoid Looking at Messages or Calls When Sitting With the Person - Personally, I hate talking on my cell phone when I am with someone else and prefer to have it completely turned off so that any call will go straight to my voicemail and not be a distraction during the date. You can always respond to the message later but you can't always get a second chance with a person you ignored because you took a phone call or text message during the date.
7) Don't Be Down On Yourself If A Date Doesn't Work Out- We all have had dates that didn't quite work out or have gone out on dates with people we didn't feel a connection with during the interaction. It can be hard to take sometimes but don't take it personally and realize there are other people out there. If a date doesn't work out, be respectful to that person, don't blast him or her on Twitter, Facebook or in other forms of media and remember to respect his or her feelings. It's better to move on then to go out of your way to hurt someone else's feelings over a date that didn't work out. Even if you don't go out with this person again or become friends, the person will remember if you were polite and respectful.
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