In my adult life, I have dabbled in the world of online dating. This world has led to some strange and exciting stories as I have met women from all walks of life. Online dating involves interacting with people you probably don't know from previous experience and in a lot of ways, is like going on blind dates.
I have had the good dates and the bad and have learned a lot along the way. One of the key aspects I have learned from these experiences is that a bad attitude in someone is more visible than you think.
Online dating involves reading profiles on these sites and trying to find someone who can be a good match. Some profiles have more information than others and I will admit, some were outright bizarre.
Reading through the profiles and participating in online dating does have a learning curve and after a certain point, I started to notice how negative attitudes came across in certain profiles. There were some that mentioned the particular dating site "sucked", "didn't work" and was "worthless". These people may have been frustrated when writing this and not thinking but it was apparent a bad attitude was there. These types of profiles became a turn off and I often skipped these to go to the next.
I didn't always see a bad attitude in a profile but sometimes saw it in the person I eventually dated or went out on one date with. There were instances in which it was apparent the other person was not happy in life based off their attitude towards their situation, how they interacted and talked to me and what was mentioned during the discussion over dinner, lunch or coffee. The attitude came out and was more apparent than the other person realized at times.
In addition to speaking with me, I often would look at how my date interacted with the server at the restaurant we were at. I sometimes would listen closely to see how this person behaved towards the server and could make an attitude assessment. If my date was rude and impolite, it came across that the person didn't have much respect for the server and it was often a turn off.
While my examples have specifically dealt with online dating, a bad attitude can visible in other settings. It can be visible where you work and where you interact based off how you talk with others and treat others as well.
Sunday, March 22, 2015
Learning To Be a Champion
There was a time period where I didn't have confidence in myself. I often felt insecure because I wasn't as smart as some other people, had to put more work into studying for tests at school and was nowhere near the top. I also wasn't a superb athlete and didn't felt like I fit in.
I was a teenager in high school when I felt this way and often wondered at the time if I was ever going to fit in. I was so focused on what other people had and lost sight of the things I did have at the time. Needless to say, it was a very difficult point in my life.
My attitude and feelings changed when I went away to Otterbein College (now University). Moving away for college was a huge step in my life and it taught me how to move on and start over. I was able to put away the frustrations I had in previous years and being a new chapter.
Not too long after I started this chapter, I found that I could make my own success by working hard. I started off only knowing two other people on campus and eventually built a friendship base within the first couple weeks of starting college. This fresh start made me a different and new person and I found myself happier than in the previous years before.
This new found happiness became more apparent when people on campus noticed I had an ebullient attitude and personality. My personality may have been overwhelming at the time to some but I remember feeling that I was much happier in life and didn't want to let that go.
In my classes and extra-curricular activities, I found I could make a difference with a positive attitude and hard work. Yes, there were still people who were smarter than me but I could still make an impact with hard work and dedication. I realized I could become a champion by being who I was and working hard.
When my college years ended, making the transition from college student to worker professional was hard but I found some consistency in what I learned in college. I found that having a positive attitude and working hard can still take you places. Who I was in high school mattered less and it was more about who I was now and how I could make an impact.
I was a teenager in high school when I felt this way and often wondered at the time if I was ever going to fit in. I was so focused on what other people had and lost sight of the things I did have at the time. Needless to say, it was a very difficult point in my life.
My attitude and feelings changed when I went away to Otterbein College (now University). Moving away for college was a huge step in my life and it taught me how to move on and start over. I was able to put away the frustrations I had in previous years and being a new chapter.
Not too long after I started this chapter, I found that I could make my own success by working hard. I started off only knowing two other people on campus and eventually built a friendship base within the first couple weeks of starting college. This fresh start made me a different and new person and I found myself happier than in the previous years before.
This new found happiness became more apparent when people on campus noticed I had an ebullient attitude and personality. My personality may have been overwhelming at the time to some but I remember feeling that I was much happier in life and didn't want to let that go.
In my classes and extra-curricular activities, I found I could make a difference with a positive attitude and hard work. Yes, there were still people who were smarter than me but I could still make an impact with hard work and dedication. I realized I could become a champion by being who I was and working hard.
When my college years ended, making the transition from college student to worker professional was hard but I found some consistency in what I learned in college. I found that having a positive attitude and working hard can still take you places. Who I was in high school mattered less and it was more about who I was now and how I could make an impact.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
Places of Happiness Can Come in Many Forms
As a teenager, I dreamed of being a sportscaster and working in some of the best sports arenas in the nation. I hoped to work in all of the sports arenas I grew up seeing on ESPN and other sports networks.
I did play-by-play for various sports games in college and high school but found talents elsewhere. I found I had a good mind for marketing and also did a couple of sales internships along the way. When I graduated from Otterbein in June of 2008, opportunities to do sales came about and I used that to start my career. With the economy the way it was, I had to take the opportunity provided to me and my sports announcing was put on hold.
After not announcing a single game for three years after I graduated, an opportunity came about to call a Solon High School hockey game. A neighbor of mine at the time had a son on the team and they desperately needed someone to announce the game. After not having called a game in three years, I took the opportunity.
The arena I called the game in was cold, cramped and nothing like the professional sports arenas I watched on TV growing up. To be honest, I didn't care at that point. After not being able to announce games for three years, I was happy to have a microphone in front of me and a game to announce. The press area was small but that place felt like heaven that day.
As I started to announce games more often after that hockey game, going back to some old stomping grounds to call games felt like going home. Solon's football stadium had provided many great memories for me growing up and I always walk out thinking how happy that place makes me. Solon's gym is the same way. Neither facility is high tech or state of the art like the press areas you see at the larger arenas but calling games in these places makes me happy. Going back reminds me how happy I was as a teenager calling games in these high school venues and how grateful I am to keep announcing the sports I love.
I did play-by-play for various sports games in college and high school but found talents elsewhere. I found I had a good mind for marketing and also did a couple of sales internships along the way. When I graduated from Otterbein in June of 2008, opportunities to do sales came about and I used that to start my career. With the economy the way it was, I had to take the opportunity provided to me and my sports announcing was put on hold.
After not announcing a single game for three years after I graduated, an opportunity came about to call a Solon High School hockey game. A neighbor of mine at the time had a son on the team and they desperately needed someone to announce the game. After not having called a game in three years, I took the opportunity.
The arena I called the game in was cold, cramped and nothing like the professional sports arenas I watched on TV growing up. To be honest, I didn't care at that point. After not being able to announce games for three years, I was happy to have a microphone in front of me and a game to announce. The press area was small but that place felt like heaven that day.
As I started to announce games more often after that hockey game, going back to some old stomping grounds to call games felt like going home. Solon's football stadium had provided many great memories for me growing up and I always walk out thinking how happy that place makes me. Solon's gym is the same way. Neither facility is high tech or state of the art like the press areas you see at the larger arenas but calling games in these places makes me happy. Going back reminds me how happy I was as a teenager calling games in these high school venues and how grateful I am to keep announcing the sports I love.
Online Dating Tips
Online dating is a popular trend in today's society. Those looking to find a romantic partner have signed up for and gone to various sites for this purpose. While it is a great way to meet others, it is also not an exact science.
From personal experience, meeting someone online is much different from meeting someone in person. For the online experience, you probably won't have any background information on the person prior to making contact. All you will know about this person is what is on the profile.
Below are some strategies for online dating:
1) Look to see what you have in common with the person reaching out to you or the person you are trying to reach - this will be key if you end up meeting the person. It is easy to go through the profiles and find random people to go out with; it may be harder to find someone you have a lot in common with. Try to find those with similar interests so that it can give you a basis for conversation during an initial date. You may still not feel a connection with this person, however, it will help in the long run to have common interests should things progress.
2) Try to have a phone conversation with this person prior to the first date - it is easy to e-mail and text over and over; it isn't always easy to have a conversation in person. One of the best ways to test if the person can hold a conversation well is by talking on the phone. Sometimes a person is more willing to talk on the phone than in person, however, it is better to get an idea what could happen before agreeing to meet someone. This is also a great way to gauge how interested the person really is and whether or not it is worth pursuing.
3) Stay away from those with bad attitudes - I know this sounds obvious but from personal experience, it will make a difference. I've seen people that put that the site they are on "sucks" and "doesn't work". I also came across one where the person thought "coffee dates were too cheap so don't bother asking." Personally, I read these profiles and was turned off by reading this information. I didn't think it was worth pursuing someone who didn't believe that the online dating was working to begin with and wasn't going to waste my time with someone who was most likely going to have a bad attitude.
4) Find those who are willing to return your calls, are interested and want to develop the relationship - it can be frustrating having to chase down someone who doesn't return calls, texts or communication in a timely manner. This can dampen the dating experience and put your time towards those who are really interested. It's a much better experience putting the time into someone who is willing to work at building the relationship than chasing someone who isn't willing to return correspondence. Your time is probably limited and put it towards someone who is willing to make the effort to get to know you.
From personal experience, meeting someone online is much different from meeting someone in person. For the online experience, you probably won't have any background information on the person prior to making contact. All you will know about this person is what is on the profile.
Below are some strategies for online dating:
1) Look to see what you have in common with the person reaching out to you or the person you are trying to reach - this will be key if you end up meeting the person. It is easy to go through the profiles and find random people to go out with; it may be harder to find someone you have a lot in common with. Try to find those with similar interests so that it can give you a basis for conversation during an initial date. You may still not feel a connection with this person, however, it will help in the long run to have common interests should things progress.
2) Try to have a phone conversation with this person prior to the first date - it is easy to e-mail and text over and over; it isn't always easy to have a conversation in person. One of the best ways to test if the person can hold a conversation well is by talking on the phone. Sometimes a person is more willing to talk on the phone than in person, however, it is better to get an idea what could happen before agreeing to meet someone. This is also a great way to gauge how interested the person really is and whether or not it is worth pursuing.
3) Stay away from those with bad attitudes - I know this sounds obvious but from personal experience, it will make a difference. I've seen people that put that the site they are on "sucks" and "doesn't work". I also came across one where the person thought "coffee dates were too cheap so don't bother asking." Personally, I read these profiles and was turned off by reading this information. I didn't think it was worth pursuing someone who didn't believe that the online dating was working to begin with and wasn't going to waste my time with someone who was most likely going to have a bad attitude.
4) Find those who are willing to return your calls, are interested and want to develop the relationship - it can be frustrating having to chase down someone who doesn't return calls, texts or communication in a timely manner. This can dampen the dating experience and put your time towards those who are really interested. It's a much better experience putting the time into someone who is willing to work at building the relationship than chasing someone who isn't willing to return correspondence. Your time is probably limited and put it towards someone who is willing to make the effort to get to know you.
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